Gosh, this is kind of awkward humanity, I know the two of you have been seeing each other for a very long time now. I know it’s your life and your choice and I will respect that, so hear me out and do with it what you will. I am there for you. It’s just… the changes I have seen in you have been dramatic and I am wondering how it feels on the inside, because as someone who knows you, the real you, something is different.
Do you remember when you used to hang out with Soul. You moved with such freedom, grace and joy. You had purpose, focus and a depth of wisdom — that is what I love so much about you. The care you had for yourself, for others was an inspiration and I still see threads of that from time to time but nothing like it used to be. I know Soul wanted to live a simpler life, but the way you two moved and what you created together was beautiful.
For some reason, Soul wasn’t enough for you and you wanted to explore what was out there. Which is when you decided to hook up with Spirit as your new boyfriend.
I know Spirit also has that otherworldly sense about him, and he seems a bit mystical and broody, but since you have been hanging around with Spirit, you seem to have lost some of your original spark. You seem more flustered than normal, bingeing on food, alcohol, TV… whatever you can get your hands on.
I am all for a good time. We used to laugh together lots but something is different. I can see that you are smiling in your social media post, pulling faces and having a laugh… but your eyes, don’t have the same sparkle.
If don’t say something, maybe no one will.
I know he seems like a cool guy, he can make things happen, make you feel good, even make you feel special and I get that. But it seems that Spirit is only happy to give you attention, as long as you do what he wants you to do. He gets angry quickly if you disobey him, and when you go out, he seems to be happy for you to pick up the bill, clean up the mess. When it comes to being responsible, he is nowhere to be seen.
I know it can make you feel needed, but if you end up having a family together, is this the kind of father you want for your kids.
What happens when you try the gentle breath meditation and want Spirit to leave you alone for 5 minutes? Does your mind become filled with thoughts and your body become fidgety? Who do you think is doing that? Who do you think suggests that you keep eating the food that keeps you feeling racy and on edge?
All I am saying is, forget about the romantic words, the flowers and fancy meals and feel a bit more deeply into his motivation — the degree to which his actions deeply care for you.
Soul was much more laid back, for sure, but he loves you for you, he cherished every part of you. You know that there is nothing you can do that will scare Soul away. Say the word and he is back, but in the meantime he is also happy to leave you alone, because it’s what you want.
All he is interested in is you being the lovely being that you are naturally.
So you’ve made a choice, and I respect that. I’ve had my say and will leave you to sit with the joy and vibrancy you had as a child and what you feel now. Practise the Gentle Breath Meditation, because at least it gives you a moment to feel if there is another way to be, or even try out some of the Esoteric Yoga you used to love so much. Let yourself feel if there is any difference, there’s got to be a reason why Spirit doesn’t like it when you connect and feel the loveliness I have seen in you before.
Call anytime humanity, I’ve got your back.